Noctis's Father Says What?
by SoaringBallad
Summary: A mysterious text from Noctis's father leaves the group of friends puzzled. But at least it leads to new discoveries.


**Disclaimer: I own nothing! This is for a contest my sister (OMFGhehehe, she'll have the only other Gladiolus and Ignis story!) and I are having, to see who can write the best Gladiolus X Ignis story, since there are none… Thanks for reading.**

**Warning: YAOI 3**

"Roaches!" screeched the King of Lucis, commonly known as Noctis's father. "There will be no word of roaches in my castle." He stated sternly. The maid who had found the little critters was standing awkwardly in front of him staring at the floor. "Get me the Royal Advisor."

"Yes sir."

"Roaches…" The King pinched the bridge of his nose. "First I get told of a revolt of the people, then the increasing crime of the main city, and now I'm told there are _roaches_ in the castle… Could this day get any worse?"

"Sir, you needed my assistance?"

"Yes, I've been told there were… you know… in my castle." The King had a slightly frightening look when he told him this, so even though the Royal Advisor had no idea what he was talking about, he nodded his head and pretended to know exactly what the big deal is.

"The cleaning crew said they could get them out in a matter of eight days," the maid from earlier piped in. "But how are we going to get everyone, such as the Prince and his friends, the nobles, and the other staff, to go somewhere for that time, without them suspecting anything.?" Both men in the room sat pondering the question.

"Make them go to a friend's house?" suggested the King, looking to his trusted Advisor. Said Advisor had to prevent himself from face-palming.

"Well," the Advisor said smartly, "we could send them on vacation." The King thought on it and then agreed to the plan. Sure it would cost a lot of money, but that wasn't as important as his reputation.

"Start planning now, and don't worry about the cost. Get everyone but the cleaning crew dismissed, and anyone we can't dismiss will be going to downtown Tokyo for a week and a half." He said definitively.

"I'll post the announcement on my twitter," the maid said as if everyone followed her on twitter.

"That's okay," the Advisor quickly said, "I'll inform them via email." As if that was any better, in this day and age no one emailed.

"Actually, I have a better idea," the King said, texting his son.

_ Noctis- Vacation starting today—a week and a half in downtown Tokyo, everyone's going._

He didn't have to wait long before he got a reply from his son.

_Father- Okay, why?_

He jumped and looked around, half expecting his son to pop out and accuse him of letting the roaches in the castle. He was that paranoid.

_Noctis- No reason, I'm not lying. Pack your things and your friends._

No reply came, so he figured his son was following directions like a good boy. He leaned back in his throne and sighed. It was going to be a long day.

XxX

"Who are you texting!" Prompto demanded of the prince. Said boy jumped.

"Yeah!" Gladiolus growled. He was glad for the addition of Prompto to their group; the boy was more over-protective of Noctis than he was!

"My father, geez, you don't-" The blonde-haired boy snatched up the phone, and read the last text aloud… or at least he tried, he had a bit of trouble reading Japanese.

"Your father says "No reason, I'm lying; pack up your friends in thongs." Wait… what?"

"He didn't really say that did he?" Noctis exclaimed.

"I don't think that is really your father," Gladiolus said, "I think it's your secret girlfriend who is trying to hook up her friends with yours." Prompto nodded in agreement.

"Who is it really Noctis?"

"That was really my-"

"Have you already finished packing?" A new voice interrupted. Gladiolus glanced over at his friend for a brief second, barely acknowledging him before snatching the phone from Prompto.

"That _is_ the King's number." He said in disbelief. He didn't even bother reading the text; he took Prompto's word for it.

"Nuh uh!" Prompto screeched! "It can't be!"

"I told you, but-" Noctis was interrupted again… and he was starting to get annoyed by it.

"The King is so dirty! He wants to rape my sexy body!" screamed Prompto on the top of his lungs.

"What are you talking about!?" Ignis asked, deeply confused by the conversation he walked in on.

"The King wants Noctis to pack up his friends—us—in thongs!" screeched Prompto. Gladiolus took the phone to show Ignis, who looked doubtful.

"I don't think-"

"It's what he sai-" Gladiolus was cut off by Prompto trying to yank the phone out of his hand. He succeeded, but it was the wall that got it and the phone lie in pieces on the floor.

"Oh shit, Noct, I'm sorry!" Prompto begun apologizing to his rich friend who could snap his fingers and have it replaced in moments.

"Prompto, it is really okay, I can get a new one," Noctis said, patting his friend on the head.

"Really?" Prompto threw his arms around Noctis and pulled him to his chest.

"I'm glad!" Noctis blushed.

"Shut up Prompto," roared Gladiolus, " you destroyed the evidence, and I'm not asking the King for his phone… in fact I don't want to be anywhere near him right now."

"Gladiolus, calm down, I believe you." Ignis said, patting the man on the head. He was lying through his teeth, but he didn't want to hurt his friends' feelings. Noctis was the only one that seemed to not believe this madness.

"So," Noctis said, free of Prompto's grasp, "I guess we have to pack for this trip right?"

"Yeah," Prompto sighed. He then perked up, "I call shotgun!" He smiled brightly.

"You would be sitting there anyway," Gladiolus said. "According to his father, Noctis is too young to sit up front, besides it's more dangerous if someone were to attack. I have to sit by him as his body guard, and Ignis drives, so by default, you have to sit in the passenger seat."

"Nuh uh," Prompto said childishly, "Noctis could be in the middle in the back with us on either side."

"No thank you!" Noctis dismissed the idea quickly.

"Aw, why not?" asked Prompto.

"…I would be squished…" Three knocks on the door prevented him from having to listen to Prompto's whining.

"Excuse me Prince," the maid said expectantly, "the King is waiting for you downstairs. He expects you to bring the, uh, 'items' with you… He said you should know what he is talking about." Noctis's face turned light pink as he nodded.

"He wasn't kidding apparently," was all he told his friends. Ignis groaned.

"Is that really what he said?" All three of them nodded their heads violently. "Oh dear, then…"

"Then we'll need to sneak out and get to Victoria's Secret!" Prompto cheered happily.

"W-w-w-what!" sputtered Noctis. Gladiolus quickly cut in.

"No, just no."

"Aw, but we have to go somewhere, and there-"

"I don't care there is one right down the block, there is no reason we need to go there."

"But I don't have a nice thong I could wear in front of the King, and they sell really nice underwear there."

"For girls," Noctis choked out.

"So, men can wear it too!" Prompto said.

"We are not going," Gladiolus said with a glare.

"Why not!" Prompto whined, his eyes widened and his lips turned slightly downward into a pout.

"I-I just feel uncomfortable going there," Gladiolus said looking away, not getting sucked into the cuteness.

"Why?"

"No reason… I'm not lying!" Gladiolus said quickly. Ignis quickly countered.

"Whenever someone says "I'm not lying" they are lying." Gladiolus looked around, then sighed, obviously defeated.

"I design clothes for them…" he mumbled. Three shocked faces were all he got in return.

"That is certainly surprising." Ignis spoke for all of them.

"Well then you must have something here for us that would be suitable for the King to see us in!" Prompto said happily.

"Are you really that anxious for my father to see you almost naked!?" Noctis squealed.

"No, but it's kinda inevitable at this point. I mean, he just said we had to be wearing thongs, he didn't say we couldn't wear anything on top of it…" He leaned over and whispered to Noctis. "I just need something fit for you to see me in later." He winked seductively. Noctis blushed again.

"Prompto, that is the smartest thing I think I have ever heard you say," said Gladiolus, making Noctis's face turn even more red.

"Really?" asked Prompto. Gladiolus nodded his head. "So you think so to, so you'll give me something out of your collection.

"Wait… what?" Gladiolus said.

"You agree that I need something for Noctis to see me in later. That's what I said that was really smart, right?"

"Woah! I never heard that! No! The thing you said before that… but I guess you guys can… browse some of the pieces I designed… I don't know if it will be in your size though."

"Why, do you make it in your size?" Prompto asked giggling. Gladiolus looked away, his face slightly red.

"Let's go."

"Do we have to go to?" asked Noctis to Ignis. Ignis didn't respond. His face was somewhat red, and he was spacing out… Noctis poked him twice, and still didn't get a response. "Ignis!" He snapped in front of said man's face.

"Oh, what is it Noctis?"

"Do we have to go…?"

"With them? Yes, unless you own a thong. I wouldn't want to get fired for something as stupid as not wearing something he asked me to," Ignis said, pulling Noctis along with him as if he was a stubborn child.

"There you guys are," Prompto said happily, "how do I look?" He twirled around in his new thong… Courtesy of Gladiolus.

"Uh," Noctis turned away blushing. Prompto grabbed his hand.

"Hey, let me go finish dressing, then we'll pack together, okay?" Noctis nodded and Prompto drug him off.

"Now it's your turn Ignis," Gladiolus said, taking him to a large dresser sitting on the side of his room. It was normally kept locked, but now it was open, and revealing a massive underwear collection.

"I, uh, don't know where to start… I guess, do you think you would have anything in my size?" Ignis blushed.

"Everything for the most part is," Gladiolus said.

"Uh, why?" Ignis was no longer embarrassed… just curious of why Gladiolus had a massive underwear collection in his size.

"Well… I wanted you to model it for me sometime, but… I was too embarrassed to ask…" Gladiolus admitted.

"Why?"

"Because I like you…" Ignis flung his arms around Gladiolus's neck.

"I like you too!" He said.

"Hey guys," Prompto interrupted.

"Well then, let's get you a thong." Gladiolus said seductively, and started to strip him.

"Guys."

"I would enjoy that," Ignis said with a smirk, leaning in to kiss Gladiolus.

"GUYS!" Prompto screamed. They both quickly turned, Ignis trying to cover himself so he was at least decent.

"Turns out that's not what Noctis's father said… hehe, I just well… I-I kinda like, suck at like… reading Japanese… And the 'items' were Noctis's rabbit skin collection, apparently they're selling for a premium in Tokyo…" Ignis face-palmed.

"Do you like ribbons?" asked Ignis.

"Ooh! Yes, ribbons are pretty, why are you going to pick a thong out with ribbons on it?" Ignis took awhile before answering, most likely because he was redressing.

"No, I'm going to slice you into ribbons." He said calmly, pulling out his katana. Prompto screamed and started running, Ignis hot on his tail.

"Well at least I got to confess to him, and I may have got myself a new model…" Gladiolus smirked, and decided to go help Prompto.


End file.
